Every reality show has at least one villain. As Sima and the show itself frequently remind us, arranged marriage is not quite the form of social control it used to be; everyone here emphasizes that they have the right to choose or refuse the matches presented to them. But as becomes especially clear when Sima works in India, that choice is frequently and rather roughly pressured by an anvil of social expectations and family duty. In the most extreme case, a year-old prospective groom named Akshay Jakhete is practically bullied by his mother, Preeti, into choosing a bride. Indian Matchmaking smartly reclaims and updates the arranged marriage myth for the 21st century, demystifying the process and revealing how much romance and heartache is baked into the process even when older adults are meddling every step of the way. Though these families use a matchmaker, the matching process is one the entire community and culture is invested in. Director Smriti Mundhra told Jezebel that she pitched the show around Sima, who works with an exclusive set of clients. Yet the show merely explains that for many Indian men, bright, bubbly, beautiful Nadia is not a suitable match. The parents task Sima with following multiple stringent expectations. Some are understandably cultural, perhaps: A preference for a certain language or religion, or for astrological compatibility, which remains significant for many Hindus.
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Indian Matchmaking, a new Netflix show, has become a huge hit, of professional matchmakers and hundreds of matrimonial websites have.
Now available to stream, the series follows Mumbai-based matchmaker Sima Taparia as she painstakingly works with singles and their families in India and America to find desirable mates for marriage. One client, New Jersey-based event planner Nadia, wonders if her Indian-ness will come into question because of her Guyanese heritage. With the global reach of Netflix, Mundhra saw an opportunity to present a look at dating and relationships through the very specific lens of the South Asian experience that would reach a wide audience.
That we have all sorts of different backgrounds, different ideals and ideologies. I think you can sort of learn a lot just from the examples and the specific journey of the participants. Mundhra ultimately met her now-husband in graduate school. There was this refreshing honesty about her, and absolute passion for what she does. Even as dating sites such as shaadi. Viewers get a glimpse of that process, which includes an emphasis on horoscopes and astrology.
She often consults with a face reader on the series, getting detailed reports of her clients based off their facial features assessed via their photos. She also assembles biodata for each client, which is essentially a marital resume, and conducts in-person consultations with her clients and their families. Taparia is still actively working with singles amid the COVID pandemic, though she has limited her consultations to phone and video.
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In Indian Matchmaking, that villain is year-old Aparna Shewakramani, a prospective bride who’s critical of every man she meets and vocal.
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The Trouble with Indian Matrimony: Matchmaker, Make me a Match!
The show has received much criticism for glorifying arranged marriages — a tradition that feeds off regressive stereotypes about genders, caste and class. While the challenges of single-hood resonated with a lot of privileged, mostly savarna Indian women and some men, it was pointed out that the labelling and sorting process of humans involved in the show glorifies deeply regressive traditions Indian women have fought hard against, and some are still unable to stand up to.
Several Dalit writers and activists pointed out that the outrage over Indian Matchmaking from dominant caste circles revealed a deep lack of selfwareness as their own social interactions were also deeply rooted in caste, which relentlessly otherises oppressed castes.
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Coronavirus: How Covid has changed the ‘big fat Indian wedding’. India’s richest family caps year of big fat weddings. A new Netflix show, Indian Matchmaking, has created a huge buzz in India, but many can’t seem to agree if it is regressive and cringe-worthy or honest and realistic, writes the BBC’s Geeta Pandey in Delhi. The eight-part docuseries features elite Indian matchmaker Sima Taparia as she goes about trying to find suitable matches for her wealthy clients in India and the US.
In the series, she’s seen jet-setting around Delhi, Mumbai and several American cities, meeting prospective brides and grooms to find out what they are looking for in a life partner. Since its release nearly two weeks back, Indian Matchmaking has raced to the top of the charts for Netflix in India. It has also become a massive social phenomenon. Hundreds of memes and jokes have been shared on social media: some say they are loving it, some say they are hating it, some say they are “hate-watching” it, but it seems almost everyone is watching it.
The in-your-face misogyny, casteism and colourism on display have caused much outrage, but also inspired many to introspection.
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The year-old Matrimony. Chennai-based Matrimony. It caters to over 3. And while dating apps are gaining traction , Matrimony. The idea for Matrimony. He had set up a community website to connect with other Indians, and noticed that it was the matrimony section that attracted the most traffic. So, in , he decided to turn this into a bigger business, and returned to Chennai to launch Matrimony. The first online matchmaking portal, Shaadi. To set his company apart, Janakiraman decided to focus on making it easy for users to search for partners from a wide range of religions, castes, languages, and other categories.
He began with Tamilmatrimony. It also runs a portal for wealthy Indians called Elitematrimony. And while competitors, including Shaadi.
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By Shreeya Sinha. India now has more than 1, matchmaking sites, giving parents — and potential brides and grooms — thousands of choices to help arrange modern marriages while allowing families to adhere to longstanding traditions regarding caste and religion. We asked readers, some of whom only gave their first names, who have used such sites to share their tips. Kadhambari Sridhar, 26, from Falls Church, Va. She said she had hoped the site for Tamils looking for mates would help her find a husband who lived in the United States and shared her religion and culture.
But that did not happen. She has been using Shaadi. Though her first encounter with a man she met on the site did not work out, she said it was a good experience because she talked to his parents first and then spent a month chatting with him before they met. Sudha was disappointed when some of the men she met in person were not the way they presented themselves in their online photos and messages. Remember: ask for a few recent photos of your match without hats or sunglasses.
Netflix show on India’s arranged marriages triggers online debate
The show follows the journey of a Mumbai-based matchmaker who arranges marriage alliances between wealthy families in India and the US. What is disconcerting is not simply the easy acceptance of social conservatism by the young and elderly, not the least by Indian diaspora in the United States. What stands out for Indians is the importance of marital status.
Arranged marriages, the norm in India, are tightly bound within the caste of the bride and groom. In crude forms like matrimonial websites, caste preferences are the main criteria, followed by physical appearance and salary potential.
As a testament to that, one of India’s oldest matchmaking portals is all set to launch its initial public offering (IPO) on Indian bourses today (Sept.
Indian Matchmaking shows picky individuals with a long list of demands that centre around caste, height and skin colour. A new Netflix show about an Indian matchmaker catering to the high demands of potential brides and grooms, and their parents, has stoked an online debate about arranged marriages in the country.
The eight-part series, Indian Matchmaking, premiered on Netflix last week and is currently among its top-ranked India shows. It features Sima Taparia, a real-life matchmaker from Mumbai, who offers her services to families in India and abroad. The show has become the subject of memes, jokes, and criticism, about the pickiness of the potential spouses and their parents, with long lists of demands centring around factors like caste, height or skin colour.
Indian Matchmaking isn’t just about the liberal colorist and sexist fabric South Asian cultures are steeped in. It’s about Brahmanical patriarchy. It’s shaped by gender, caste, and economic relationships, and Indian Matchmaking depicts exactly that. The show “makes very clear how regressive Indian communities can be.
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Your spouse is just a set of qualifications to finally one-up your neighbours or your rival at work. Stagnant social mobility, casteist educational institutions and economic inequality glom together to create families, neighbourhoods, schools, colleges and work places where everyone has similar incomes and wealth, lifestyles, intellectual interests and ambitions.
In other words, the metrics of compatibility all conspire towards upholding oppressive structures. Practicing hyper-individuality to stand out on dating apps is disenchanting, having your personhood disregarded completely is no better. Marital rape is still legal in India. Disputes and murders over dowry are regular news items.
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What influences our youth to set aside their enterprising, free-wheeling spirit to follow the well-trodden path of arranged marriages? Part of the answer lies in the deep socialisation process, which is woven into the fabric of the close-knit extended Indian family, and its rootedness in the larger network of society. The young too seem to believe in the cultural definition of marriage as a family affair, rather than an individual undertaking.
Right at the beginning of the Netflix hit show Indian Matchmaking, Or there are the matrimonial columns in newspapers and on websites, rife.
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